Sometimes I’m a Bad Girlfriend

I believe I informed you, dear friends, of my “brb crying on the floor” moment while struggling under the pressure of standardized testing last week. I also regaled you with a tale of Boyfriend’s expert boyfriend-ing. His ability to laugh with/at me while comforting me is trulyastonishing.

This memory hung heavy on my heart strings yesterday morning as I walked home from Boyfriend’s house. Walking along in the early morning rays, I realized how incredibly selfish I am when the situation is flipped.

The night before was a rough one for Boyfriend. He was stressin’ pretty hard about the future. I wish I could tell you I helped, that I gave back all the love and support he’s given me in my moments of madness.

I absorbed his anxiety. I became terrified about the future and couldn’t focus on anything else. I tried to talk him through his issues but I wasn’t much help.

It wasn’t until I walked home the next morning that I realized what a jerk I’d been.

This is not a “woe is me, pity me I’m such a bad girlfriend, ugh, I don’t know how to girlfriend” post. This is a revelation.

I acted like a butthead! I did, I was a big, dumb poopy-pants of a girlfriend.

So I thought about it and realized how unfair I’d been.

And apologized and promised to work on it.

And really started to be better.

As it turns out relationships are about learning and growing as much as anything else in life. Who knew?

Luckily we can all add Boyfriend’s forgiving nature to his list of amazing personality traits and he can continue out-significant-other-ing me for another day.

I don’t mind it one bit.

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9 thoughts on “Sometimes I’m a Bad Girlfriend

  1. I have the exact same problem! Like your boyfriend, my husband is awesome when I’m anxious but I suck at being supportive myself! It all ends up with me getting anxious myself. Working on it too, hopefully we’ll get better and be able to support them like they do us.

    Liked by 1 person

    • It is such a relief that I’m not the only one. I think it would help a lot to learn to take myself out of the situation entirely, but, man, easier said than done, am I right? Thanks for reading (and agreeing of course)
      🙂 Best of luck!

      Like

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