This week I’ve had a hard time; with blogging, with working, with going on a run without hurting myself. It’s been a week for sure.
Lately I’ve been focusing on putting everything together for grad school and moving to New York, which mostly means thinking things are ok until I take one step forward and everything is 100% not ok. Between weird rental policies, holds on my student account, and
casually taking out tens of thousands of dollars in loans financial aid, I’ve been absolutely killing myself with stress.
Until Tuesday when I left my phone at home.
When I first got to work, dug through my purse and realized I’d left it on my bed next to a slumbering Boyfriend, my first thought was “how strange, I should text Boyfriend, wait…”
Not having my phone meant focusing on what was in front of me. It meant not checking for alerts or messages in between small children reading to me. It also meant not constantly refreshing my email to see if the realtor has gotten back to me. It meant a little peace and quiet from the self-induced stress machine that is the Internet.
Around lunch I panicked a bit, worried because I needed to work a couple of things out fairly urgently via email. However, on my lunch I found a staff computer and took care of everything in about five minutes. Without Instagram, Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, Snapchat, Twitstagram, Chatbook, Facelr, I was able to complete an important task without distraction.
The starkest realization I had was that I didn’t really miss the internet constantly whispering in my ear. I didn’t get home and jump on my phone to make sure I hadn’t missed the trivial daily drama. I did check to see if I missed anything truly important and guess what, I didn’t.
So this week I’ve started leaving my phone in my purse, checking it once before lunch and then putting it away again. I haven’t missed anything dire yet and my stress level has plummeted. Turns out my phone is not my lifeline, but in some ways, my stressor.
If you’re feeling anxious or stressed this week you should know: I feel you. I feel you so hard, bro. Take a breath, put down your phone and read a book or go for a walk. Do a thing that humans were built to do.
And best of luck.
***Sidenote: if anyone knows of any cheap(ish) apartments in NYC I’m listening…***